My dog has separation anxiety

The problem

My dog never seems to relax unless he is on my lap on the sofa, or on my bed. He follows me around everywhere. If I try to leave him he scratches and whines at the door or barks constantly, or rips up his bed.

Why do dogs do this?

If you haven't trained your dog to be happy on his own and relax in the knowledge that you will be coming home soon, then your dog is likely to experience some separation anxiety when you leave him. This will be exacerbated if you allow your dog to follow you everywhere, sleeping in your bedroom, following you into the toilet etc. You may soon find your dog is in a permanent state of stress if you are out of sight, which leads to problems of chewing furniture, pooing inside, or barking constantly.

What works for me?

My advice is to build up your separation gradually, before you have to leave your dog for a long period.

Try to make sure your dog has some alone time each day. Randomly walk out of your exit door, wait a couple of minutes then re-enter. When you return, try to be really boring and don't make a fuss so eventually your dog doesn't get excited when you come back in. Leave your dog downstairs whilst you go upstairs for a while. Try to come down when you know your dog is calm, so don't leave it too long until they get distressed.
Practice flitting between 2 rooms with the door open. Don't stop your dog from following you, but just ignore him. Each time he starts to settle in your room, move back to the other room. Make it so its not worthwhile following you and eventually he will get bored of getting up each time you move. If you reward him with your attention each time he follows you, then he will keep following you!
Build up your separation time. Start with 2 minute bursts, then 5 mins, then 10, then 20, 30, build up to an hour and so on.
When you are at home, try to avoid letting your dog follow you everywhere. ie make sure you can go to the toilet on your own! If they get too dependent on you, they will be anxious when you are out of sight and won't know how to sleep unless you are around, so try to ensure they know how to settle on their own. The link below to "Hot Zone" training is a useful way of teaching your dog to settle on their own.
When you are going out, try to avoid making a big fuss when you leave, keep everything calm and relaxed, but do mark the moment that you are leaving with a "good boy, back soon" and leave your dog with an exciting treat such as a filled KONG, or a licky mat covered in peanut butter to keep him busy whilst you are out.
If you think your dog may be getting distressed when you leave him, a good tip is to set up a video to record what is happening whilst you are out. If you can monitor this and make sure you return just before the trouble starts, then will be easier to alter bad habits.
If all else fails, then you can always adopt another dog so yours will never be alone again 😜

Please do not leave your dog to "cry it out."

If anyone has told you to just let them cry it out then this is a surefire way of making your dog fearful every time you leave the house. Its not kind for the dog and is not likely to work either!

If your dog has separation anxiety, try to arrange someone to be with your dog whilst you work on the training. You cannot train a dog that is completely stressed out. You can only start from a positive place.

Chaining

Because dogs watch our every move, they often predict our actions way before they take place. They look for patterns which suggest you may be going out or going to bed. For example my dogs get excited when I reach for my wellies, but watch with a sulk if I put on my “nice” shoes.

Grabbing keys, putting on a particular coat, turning off the lights, plumping the cushions… these are all signals to a dog that they are about to be left. So pay careful attention to your actions and potentially change your routine it as it could be that you are creating a chain of events that causes your dog to be stressed even before you have left.

So change it up. Pick up your keys, put your shoes on, then go cook dinner or watch some tv. Pop out the door in your slippers for 30 secs then come back in. Open the door, talk out loud to Mr Invisible, then come back in. Get creative, the idea is to break the chain that triggers the prediction and causes the anxiety.

Ready to bubble over?

Think of your dog's boiling point...if your dog is already stressed in other aspects of his life (eg reactive on walks, scared of new things, frighted of the dog next door, barks at everyone that passes the window...) then his threshold for bubbling over is likely to be higher than a dog who is calm and happy most of the time.

So you may find that if you work on reducing stress in other parts of his life, he may be better equipped to handle some time alone.

Make sure your dog is getting enough down time to relax and calm down with activities he can do on his own. Long lasting chews, licky mats, snuffle mats, food scattered in the grass for him to find are all great for helping a dog to calm down and relax.

Hot zone Training

Susan Garrett is an amazing positive trainer with loads of useful tricks up her sleeve. Here she teaches a dog to settle on a mat (the hot zone) by playing simple games that the dog loves. Once the dog has mastered this, you can move your "hot zone" to their bed, to a crate, under the table at the pub, and your dog should learn to settle there.

Its really useful for a dog to learn to settle away from you and once they understand that you want them to stay there, rather than following you around, they will be able to relax in their space.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aMJtUGgUR9Y&feature=youtu.be

More information

For further reading and specialist advice about Separation Anxiety please visit the following links:

https://www.thecanineconsultants.co.uk/post/separation-anxiety-fact-vs-fiction

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